I’ve decided that in order to tell this story "right"....to tell it from my heart, I need to ease up on my insistence that it be 'perfect' and just allow it to come forth creating a space for the story to unfold. As such, I will be adding to this tale as time goes along. To begin, here is an Ode to Charlotte.

An Ode to Charlotte

Charlotte, my beautiful girl. 
Look! Look at what our Love has created!
You opened my heart in ways that only your tenderness and vulnerability could.
You are a precious and very dear little reminder.
Charlotte, I love you.

She was born on a hot and steamy day in summertime June. I remember running down the hill to their pasture that morning (and every other morning weeks prior) with childlike enthusiasm, waiting for this perfect gift to be unveiled. Such anticipation. Such joy. And she was….perfect.

Her mother, Scarlet was a wonderful mother having birthed several crias. And to my surprise she never required assistance from us. Quite astonishing really. She was calm, the kind of calm that I’ve only seen animals exude. And I, pregnant for the first time, was anxious about her delivery. Bringing my own personal story to each experience, I was overwhelmed by the uncertainties. So much unknown, so many questions: How will it happen? When will it happen? Will we be okay? 

With every baby alpaca, or cria, she had birthed in the past, Scarlet was on her feet nursing them right away, or within minutes. So, when she still wasn’t up on her feet after an hour, we knew something was wrong.

It was a rollercoaster of a day. We all did the best we could. Trying desperately to keep Scarlet and her baby comfortable and cool amidst the growing summer heat. Our vet made a farm visit to help. We really did try to save her…..we tried to save her for her and for her brand new baby.

Scarlet died late that afternoon in the barn stall atop some freshly laid hay and her newborn, Charlotte next to her. I can still hear Charlotte calling for her mother in her gentle hum. Even now, my heart breaks.

There we were and there was little 14 pound baby Charlotte needing a mother, needing food, warmth and someone to keep her safe. And so, we decided to carry her up to the house for the night and our adventure with Charlotte began.

Where will we sleep? Knowing that I needed to stay with her, knowing that I couldn't leave her alone, we decided the mudroom would be a perfect place to lay down some blankets and pillows.



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